I hate when I’m all to myself, thinking thoughts, just doing me and some random douche comes and says… “Why you so down today what happen?”…then I’m a douche for answering and saying… “I’m not down just thinking”…then they go off on how they dont believe me and I’m seriously like wtf ever!!! Why can’t people just have those selfy moments…I love when I have those moments where I can just think and clear my head. That way I dont just pop off at people, I can be a total hag sometimes…So to balance myself I need that time. If you see me looking zone, dont be alarm, I’m just leveling my social performance…Right!
It’s been awhile since I wrote anything, I’ve been caught up in this life of mines. Trying to live it the best way I know how. So let’s see how quickly I can catch up….
In February, I started dating a coworker…started of real good, with it being a secret and all. But like any secret, it only stays that way for so long. People found and things went crazy. We stopped talking for maybe a month (shortly after my bday in May), and then got back together. Now that we are back together, living together and moving forward, the past still has sort of a hold.
In the beginning it was me not wanting people to find out because we work together. Oh and the fact that I’m older, I knew the negative comments would come flying…BUT now, I’m feeling some type of way because people don’t know. I feel all bent and out of shape when he don’t invite me places but invites my friend. I feel like now people have gotten to him and he’s now ashame or something…
For his birthday I tried my best to make him happy that day…I saved and sacrificed, it was good. Besides the lil hurdles that we have, it isnt all bad. Maybe this is my karma for not putting in this effort in all my other relationships. IDK….smt…IDK, trying to keep positive!!!!